Don't let your Past Spoil Your Future

[title maintitle=”” subtitle=”3 Steps to Freedom From Your Past “]

As I sit in bed due to a horrible migraine, I’m reminded that I have this headache because I am stressing out about my past repeating itself. This is when I realized I was letting my past spoil my future.

I’ve been unfortunate enough to have two surgeries in the worst locations. The first was due to a fractured pelvis bone that left me on medical disability for three months because I couldn’t walk. The second was a torn labrum in my hip that forced me to stop dancing for almost two years and on crutches for four months.

Both of these situations happened right as I was getting my life together and big things were occurring. And in both cases I felt like everything good came to a screeching stop. I became depressed, I felt alone and as if the universe was against my success. This led to a deeper depression and the need to lean on someone.

What I’ve discovered is that the need to lean on someone when you’re down is a vicious trap. The reality is that others have lives and can’t always be there for you when you think you need them and that can hurt. This can lead to feeling abandoned and alone thinking nobody is there for you. In my case, it led to either suicidal thoughts or one attempt that I almost didn’t survive.

So hearing the doctor yesterday say I may need surgery on my knee threw me back into reliving my past. I’m sure I probably had a panic attack or two last night. However, not making peace with my past is only going to continue to stress me out.

There is nothing positive that comes from living in the past. You can look at your past and remember the lessons it taught you, but repeating it never has a happy ending.

What I’ve learned is that your past doesn’t have to spoil your future if you follow these three steps.

Awareness

The first step to not letting your past spoil your future is being aware that you have an issue with reliving the past or letting it affect your future. Fortunately, I’ve gotten the awareness part down.

What is The Lesson?

The second step is understanding the lesson you were supposed to learn from that incident. In my case, the lesson I needed to understand is that I’m strong enough to deal with another surgery on my own and that it will not stop or slow down my success. This can be the harder step as it takes a lot of self-reflection and then acceptance of things you may want to deny about yourself.

Letting Go

The third and final step to not letting your past spoil your future is letting go of the past and continuing to move towards your purpose in life. This is where I struggle a lot. I hold onto toxic relationship and at times, negative thoughts about myself. I guess I’m slowly learning the art of letting go, which is its own blog post.

I’d love to say I’m hella evolved, but by no means have I mastered all three steps. However, I am actively working towards not letting my past spoil my future. That’s all I can ask of myself and to celebrate the small wins as I move towards living my life’s purpose.